black holes and revelations.

Can i just say that things are settling in back home in MD now... i think i'm finding my way back into life here in a completely different way than before yet still me at home. And things are busy busy busy. as usual. but good.

I've just finished a photo essay for my women's studies class... its a FABULOUS class... but as i was completing the assignment, it struck me in so many ways young girls are socialized into seeing their physical assets as possibly the most important parts of them. I see it everyday at work, whether its little five-year-old kaitlyn telling me when she does jumping jacks she fits into her clothes better, or babysitting four year old kennedy who tells me she wants a belly like this (sucks in stomach.) And truly it breaks my heart. Why is society telling these girls what you look like is the most important, how thin you are determines your worth... God it makes me sick. No doubt i like to look pretty, anyone who knows me knows i love to dress up, but i don't think that my only worth is in my appearance. Although i have to say middle school and highschool do really make you concerned with all things physical. And it is hard when so much around you says be pretty, be blonde, be thin, be blue eyed, be this mold.
Beauty is sooo much more than purely physical. You can find beauty everywhere... in any size and any shape and any color. Why are we telling these girls who you are, what you think, your dreams, your thoughts, they don't mean much? What you look like thats where your value comes from... gosh it just makes me soooo upset. And we wonder why girls give themselves away so quickly to boys who don't deserve them yet... because they don't believe they are worth more... (and im sure there are lots of issues with boys and masculinity.) And sooo many times i find my girlfriends in these situations with these loser guys that they can't seem to ditch, and they give so much to them... and my heart cries... i just want to tell them "you're worth more than that, you are worth more than that." so that it will sinnk into they're very being, but it rarely does. and my heart cries.